you left me a wonderful memories that i will never forget.
HAIS! just woke up.. ytd sleep ard 1+am.. hehe.. so tired loh.. ytd work lyk no ppl i dun even hab the mood to work as well.. hahax.. keep ask arzian can punch out anot.. pull arzian eye lashes.. herr's so long loh.. den shikin and juli went smoking.. den ask me wan follow mahs.. i say dun need bahs.. i at here can liao.. sian.. dun wan die so early also loh.. very long nv drink vodka liao lehs.. =X nvm lahs.. dun drink also wun die.. now life is meaningless to me liao.. wad fer loh.. thinking if shld mit up today.. since there is a problem but y i still wanna mit up lehs? wasnt i the stupid one? i owei is.. i told him if he reali can accept hu i reali am den reply me.. i didnt get a reply.. i keep thinking will it be he didnt recieve the msg? or he reply le i didnt recieve? wen tis morining i got min to msg him.. she got a reply.. i'm not hurt tht i didnt get a reply.. bud i know tis 11mth actually he cant accept hu i reali am.. u guys no how pain i felt.. 11mth not long.. not short.. he didnt accpet hu i reali am.. den y the hell every mth keep writting letter to each other.. seriously.. if he cant accept hu i am its just a piece of shait.. or craps.. i tot among all my kor.. he understand me well.. bud i am wrong.. he dun at all.. he cant accept the fact tht i am lyk tis.. wasnt i stupid to be crying at least every mth? yup.. i'm stupid.. if u got my username and password to tis blog.. u all can see my entries.. most of it is sadden dse.. cos of him.. i cant believe tht tis 11mth is crap.. is just lyk we know each other.. bud dun reali wanna accept each other flaws.. wad the piny of telling me in every mth letter tht next i know is one year.. now, since he cant accept hu i am.. one year dun matter to me as well.. usually, i do things fer ppl sake.. i not saying if i'm great or sumthing.. bud i continue to study even do assessment cos i know i wan him to be happy and dun owei angry me.. but to me now.. wad the hell i'm doing tis fer? i quit smoking.. stop drinking is it fer my own sake? pls.. you promise not to hurt me anymore.. you promise it.. but did u do it?is it consider as lying to me? mayb u reali tis 11mth nv lie to me b4.. only you no the ans.. but ya.. i wasnt truthful to you sumtime.. but you think i reali lurve to lie to you? i felt guilty as well.. now t think i shldnt felt lyk tht.. cos if i felt remoseful.. tht mean i change.. y shld i change fer sumone hu actually cant accept hu i am? why histopry of quarrelling keep occur? yah.. i blame you fer not able to accept me.. i had enuff of tis kind of llife.. now let me tel you.. the choice is in you to wan me back anot.. you can choose to forgif me or u can continue to be angry.. you said th i;m sorry to trust you.. yah.. you shld be.. den shld i say tht i;'m sorry to myself to treasure you so much? perhaps i shld say.. i'm sorry to myself to trust you are accepting me.. i reali hate myself fer trasuring you too much.. now i wanna leave but i scare i cant do it.. why? if i reali wanna lie to you.. will i be asking everyne hu wanna take over me today? so tht i can off and find min and complete my work.. why? is it you muz reali wait til you lose me den you strat to regret? or mayb you nv will..
now.. the choice reali lie in you.. i no you will be reading it one day.. be it tht we are still together or already go separate way.. i wan you to know one thing.. if at the 10th july 2004 you told me to be your mei.. i tot you already accept hu i am.. iif now you cant.. you only hab two way.. to leave me or stay and change me slowly.. if you wanna leave i wun force you.. i'm tired.. i reali am.. i keep crying.. i nv so weak b4.. wad matter to you isnt me or hu.. is if did i lie to you b4.. now the answer is yes.. i did lie b4.. but is it reali matter to you so much? mayb not only i need such reflection.. you as a kor need too.. i wun msg you til you msg me.. if you reali wan tis relation to go out of track den you dun hab to do anything abt it.. if ou still wan me tis mei.. den think if you shld reply me and accept me.. i know lyktht say lyk you in fault.. but i nv say tht as well.. hope to heard frm you soon.. bye..
;1:06 PM
PROFILE
PEICHING
fifteen
25April
Greenridge sec
4E3
CRAVINGS
pass my maths tests
turtle paradise
ADORES
4E3
Precious*
* riza .
* elaine .
* zhihui .
* xuanmin .
* beelin .
* kokheng .
* atikah .
* jon .
* shaun .
* joachim .
* preena .
* colleen .
* Lya .
* connie .
* felicia .
* alexis .
* nysa .